People who avoid the dentist are rarely being irrational. Most have a specific reason, and it is usually something that actually happened to them. Understanding what the fear is attached to matters, because different fears have different solutions.
Quick Facts
What Are People Actually Afraid Of at the Dentist?
Ask someone what they are afraid of at the dentist and the answer is rarely just the dentist. It is one particular thing.
Loss of control. Lying back, mouth open, unable to speak, with someone working above you. For many people this is the whole of it, and it has little to do with pain. Needles. A distinct fear that happens to be encountered at the dentist rather than one caused by dentistry. Sounds and vibration. The drill in particular, sometimes because of an association with a previous experience. Gagging. People with a sensitive gag reflex often dread x-rays and impressions more than treatment. A specific past experience. An appointment where the anesthetic did not work properly, or where someone did not stop when asked. This is the most common single cause we hear about, and it is entirely reasonable. Embarrassment. Patients who have avoided care for years often fear judgment more than treatment. Worth saying plainly: it is not our job to lecture anyone, and we have seen it before.Should You Tell the Dentist You Are Anxious?
This is the single most useful thing you can do, and the thing patients most often skip.
An office that knows in advance can book more time so nothing is rushed, plan the appointment to start with the easiest part, arrange the room before you sit down, and brief the whole team rather than leaving you to explain yourself again to each person.
It also removes the need to raise it while you are already in the chair, which is the hardest moment to bring it up.
Saying it can be as simple as one sentence when you call. Nobody will make a thing of it.
What to say when you call
Something like: I get anxious at the dentist and it has been a while. Can we start with a consultation rather than treatment? That is enough. Our team books these regularly and will plan the appointment around it without needing further explanation.
What Helps With Dental Anxiety?
Agree a stop signal. Raise a hand and everything stops. This sounds small and it is remarkably effective, because most of the fear of losing control comes from believing you cannot interrupt. Ask for narration, or ask for none. Some patients feel better knowing exactly what is happening next. Others find it worse. Say which you are. Bring headphones. Music or a podcast removes the sound entirely, which for some people is most of the problem. Morning appointments. Less time spent anticipating it, and generally a less rushed part of the day. Bring someone with you. Perfectly normal and often helps. Start with a consultation. A first visit does not have to involve treatment. Meeting the dentist, talking through what you are worried about, and leaving again is a legitimate appointment.What If Anesthetic Has Not Worked Well for You?
A specific fear worth addressing on its own, because it comes up constantly: patients who have had an experience where they could still feel something.
If that has happened to you, say so. It is important clinical information rather than a complaint. There are reasons it happens and there are ways of approaching it differently, and your dentist can only account for it if they know.
Do not assume it means anesthetic will not work for you. Tell whoever is treating you and let them plan around it.
Is Sedation an Option for Dental Anxiety?
For some patients, sedation makes care possible that otherwise would not be. Our post on sedation dentistry covers the types and who it tends to suit.
It is not automatically the answer. It suits some situations better than others, and whether it is appropriate depends on your medical history, the treatment planned, and your own preference.
That is a conversation to have with your dentist rather than a decision to make in advance. If you want to explore it, raise it at a consultation.
What If You Have Not Seen a Dentist in Years?
Patients who have avoided the dentist for a long time often expect a reckoning. That is not how the appointment goes.
A first visit after a long gap is an examination and a conversation. Your dentist establishes what is there, explains it, and works out with you what order to address things in. Nothing gets done to you at that appointment that you have not agreed to.
Treatment can be staged over time rather than tackled in one overwhelming block. If cost is part of what has kept you away, our insurance and financing page and financing options including CareCredit are both worth reading, and our membership plan exists for patients without dental insurance.
The gap does not need explaining. Booking the appointment is the difficult part and it is the only part that requires anything of you.
Where Is Mountainside Dental Located?
La Quinta
78461 CA-111
Serving La Quinta, Indian Wells, Palm Desert and Indio
Rancho Mirage
42500 Bob Hope Dr STE 1
Serving Rancho Mirage, Cathedral City and Palm Springs
Yucaipa
11834 Bryant St., Ste. #104
Serving Yucaipa, Calimesa, Redlands and Cherry Valley
Rancho Santa Margarita
29941 Aventura, Suite B
Serving RSM, Mission Viejo, Coto de Caza and Ladera Ranch
Lake Forest
23731 El Toro Rd. Unit D
Serving Lake Forest, Baker Ranch, Foothill Ranch and Portola Hills
Frequently Asked Questions
Start with a conversation
Book a consultation at the Mountainside Dental office nearest you. No treatment, just a chance to talk it through.
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